I don't mean to imply that I'm always picking up on all unspoken rules, for the record! Or that I've never been stressed about it. But it's pretty situational whether I feel stressed or only embarrassed afterwards or just put my chin up stubbornly and go WELL THEY WEREN'T CLEAR SO I DON'T SEE WHY I SHOULD BE BOTHERED, whereas in fiction watching characters flounder hits my secondhand embarrassment squick hard, a lot of the time. But I do love Frances Hardinge and all her books, emphatically including A Face Like Glass and all the themes it choses to juggle, so.