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Trying something new here, and writing a book review by comparing two books to each other, instead of giving each their own space!
So I read two romance novels recently with #ownvoices autistic representation, which is excellent! And now I want to talk about them in relation to each other, because I ended up liking one of them far more than the other.
A Girl Like Her by Talia Hibbert I read last month, and I don't really remember all the details anymore but it was super great. I liked how unapologetic it was (and Ruth was!) about Ruth's autism. Being autistic informs Ruth's life and choices, but it's never presented as bad or a problem to be overcome. The relationship between Ruth and Evan was lovely, and it was very affirming for me to read a book like this about a neurodivergent person being deserving of love just as she is. I had a lot of feelings about that which I had trouble putting into words at the time (and still do) but: yes good.
The Kiss Quotient by Helen Hoang, on the other hand, I just finished and although there were some things I really liked....I had some arguments with aspects of it. Here's my issues.
1. This is just a me thing I know, but it is a book with a LOTTTTTTT of focus on sex. That's just not one of the things that draws me to read in the romance genre, so it was tedious being like, I wanna just skip past all the endless sex but there's important character moments sprinkled into the sex sometimes so I can't.
2. It felt to me like the male lead, Michael, was bulldozing past Stella's stated boundaries way too often. And this was portrayed as positive persistence in getting past her barriers, instead of boundary-crossing and bad. And yes, he always turned out to be correct in reading what she actually wanted vs the no she was saying, but that doesn't stop his behaviour from being inappropriate, and it eventually started to make me really uncomfortable.
3. Philip....OH BOY. Philip sexually harasses Stella multiple times, but this is presented more as a thing around Michael's jealousy, or around Philip being a bad match for Stella, and less that he is a SEXUAL HARASSER WHICH IS A BAD THING TO BE AND AUTOMATICALLY TAKES YOU OUT OF THE RUNNING AS A POTENTIAL PARTNER. Ughhhhhh.
Compare points 2 & 3 above to A Girl Like Her, which was consciously careful about consent, and which explicitly dealt with the fact that one of the leads had previously been in an abusive relationship and that it was fucked up.
I liked Stella, and I liked that over the course of the The Kiss Quotient she learns to be more accepting of her autistic traits, and that it doesn't mean there's something wrong with her, while not dismissing the real challenges she experiences in an allistic society. But did she have to learn it with a boundary-crosser like Michael??
The two books feature women at very different stages in their path of understanding and accepting being autistic, and both are great and have value in being represented! But as a romance novel, A Girl Like Her worked wayyyyyyyyyyy better for me than The Kiss Quotient.
So I read two romance novels recently with #ownvoices autistic representation, which is excellent! And now I want to talk about them in relation to each other, because I ended up liking one of them far more than the other.
A Girl Like Her by Talia Hibbert I read last month, and I don't really remember all the details anymore but it was super great. I liked how unapologetic it was (and Ruth was!) about Ruth's autism. Being autistic informs Ruth's life and choices, but it's never presented as bad or a problem to be overcome. The relationship between Ruth and Evan was lovely, and it was very affirming for me to read a book like this about a neurodivergent person being deserving of love just as she is. I had a lot of feelings about that which I had trouble putting into words at the time (and still do) but: yes good.
The Kiss Quotient by Helen Hoang, on the other hand, I just finished and although there were some things I really liked....I had some arguments with aspects of it. Here's my issues.
1. This is just a me thing I know, but it is a book with a LOTTTTTTT of focus on sex. That's just not one of the things that draws me to read in the romance genre, so it was tedious being like, I wanna just skip past all the endless sex but there's important character moments sprinkled into the sex sometimes so I can't.
2. It felt to me like the male lead, Michael, was bulldozing past Stella's stated boundaries way too often. And this was portrayed as positive persistence in getting past her barriers, instead of boundary-crossing and bad. And yes, he always turned out to be correct in reading what she actually wanted vs the no she was saying, but that doesn't stop his behaviour from being inappropriate, and it eventually started to make me really uncomfortable.
3. Philip....OH BOY. Philip sexually harasses Stella multiple times, but this is presented more as a thing around Michael's jealousy, or around Philip being a bad match for Stella, and less that he is a SEXUAL HARASSER WHICH IS A BAD THING TO BE AND AUTOMATICALLY TAKES YOU OUT OF THE RUNNING AS A POTENTIAL PARTNER. Ughhhhhh.
Compare points 2 & 3 above to A Girl Like Her, which was consciously careful about consent, and which explicitly dealt with the fact that one of the leads had previously been in an abusive relationship and that it was fucked up.
I liked Stella, and I liked that over the course of the The Kiss Quotient she learns to be more accepting of her autistic traits, and that it doesn't mean there's something wrong with her, while not dismissing the real challenges she experiences in an allistic society. But did she have to learn it with a boundary-crosser like Michael??
The two books feature women at very different stages in their path of understanding and accepting being autistic, and both are great and have value in being represented! But as a romance novel, A Girl Like Her worked wayyyyyyyyyyy better for me than The Kiss Quotient.
